Kronk's New Groove (also known as The Emperor's New Groove 2: Kronk's New Groove) is a 2005 American direct-to-video animated musical comedy film animated by Toon City Animation and released by Walt Disney Home Entertainment on December 13, 2005. The film is the sequel and spin-off to the 2000 animated film The Emperor's New Groove. Come on!!!! Come on!!!!!!!!

Kuzco

  • So, right about now, you're probably wondering, "Hey, where's that emperor guy?" Wella-wella-boom, baby! Kuzco here, coming to you live from the palace.
  • Please, don't grovel, it's embarrassing. I'm not like that anymore. I'm a good guy now. Didn't you see the first movie? [Pulls out a giant poster for The Emperor's New Groove] Yay! A 50-foot-me! I loved that movie because it was all about me. But now it's Kronk's turn in the limelight. So let me put it as simply as possible: This is his movie, not my movie. His movie, not mine. His, not mine. All right, everybody got it? Even the little ones? Good. So grab some popcorn, take a sippy-sip of your sip stuff, and enjoy. I'll be back later to check up on you. Now, action!

Kronk

  • Don't cry for me, Marge and Tina.
  • You don't let a guy like Papi down, or you'll get one of these. The Cold Shoulder, the Frenzied Eyebrow, the Grimace of Doom, the Sneer of Despair, the Crippling Wince of Guilt, the Scowl of Impending Wrath, and, worst of all, the Nostril Flare of Total Rejection.
  • My nightmare began on a day like any other. Actually, that would make it a daymare, but I digress.
  • [looking at the souvenir photo; disappointed] Rats, my eyes are closed.
  • Dear Papi, remember how you never thought I'd amount to anything? Well, I got news for you. Good news. I finally got that big house on a hill you've always wanted me to have. It's really great. You're gonna love it. It's got all the amenities. Swimming pool, golf course… The windmill's a killer. And my favorite part of all. Pancake junction! I even built a cozy little guest wing just for you. Yep. Just a big, serious house for a big, serious guy. Like me. That's who I am.
  • These oven mitts were the last thing she touched, other than my fragile heart… Before she walked out of my life.
  • Why?! Why is this happening? I-I-I just don't understand. It just doesn't make any sense. Was it loop over, loop under and pull, or loop under, loop over and pull?
  • Dear Papi, remember how I've never been able to meet the right girl? Uh, any girl? Well, I finally found the woman of my dreams. She's everything you could want in a woman and more. Don't get too excited. We'll take it nice and slow at first. And we'll get married in a fancy ceremony and have lots and lots of kids. - Love, Kronk.
  • You see, Papi, you may look at my life and think I've got nothing, but the truth is… I've got everything.

Yzma

  • Welcome to my new secret lab!
  • I've finally done it, Kronk. I've created the elixir of life. The answer to everyone's prayers. Behold! The fountain of youth in a bottle! [thunder crashes] Regular and diet.
  • I NEED GOLD, KRONK! [realizes what she said; laughs] I mean, you need gold.
  • Step right up, ladies and gentlemen! It's finally arrived. The cure for everything that ails you. Yzma's Young and Beautiful!
  • Back off, or I'll jump! [looks down below] Wait, that can't be right.
  • My most fiendishly diabolical potion ever! When I drink this, you won't be able to lay a finger on me!

Dialogue

Rudy: I got wrinkles, bunions, ear hair! I'm still old!
Topo: Hey, he's right! I'm still old, too!
Ipi: Me too! And Hildy looks like…
Hildy: Uh-uh-uh. Don't even!
Crowd: Yzma's a crook!
Yzma: [chuckles nervously] Would you excuse me a moment? [runs away]
Kronk: Hey! That's not fair!
Birdwell: You ruined the aquatic event for my poppets.
Kronk: But now you've ruined it for my, uh…
Tipo: [whispers] Poppets.
Kronk: Poppets. I knew that.
Birdwell: Well then, I suppose you should've thought of that sooner. Come alone, chippers! Toodle pip. Toodle pip.
Kronk's Shoulder Devil: Hey, look. Aren't those your eggs?
Kronk: [reading the label on the carton] "Kronks eggs. Property of Kronk. Do not touch except for Kronk." Hey! What are you doing with my eggs?!
Birdwell: What are you doing with my raisins, sir?
Kronk: These aren't your raisins.
Birdwell: [swipes the box out of his hand] "Birdwell's raisins. Property of Birdwell. Do not touch except for Birdwell."
Kronk: Huh. You think I would have seen that. I need those raisins.
Birdwell: Well, I need them more!
Kronk: Then you're ruining this for my kids!
Birdwell: You're wrecking it for mine!
Kronk: You disqualified us!
Birdwell: You tried to drown us!
Kronk: This is all your fault!
Birdwell: This is all your fault! [steps on his foot in pain]
Kronk: Is not!
Birdwell: Is too, you twit!
Kronk: Give!
Birdwell: [reading the label on the bag] "Tipo's itching powder. Property of Tipo. Do not touch except for Tipo." Tipo?! How could you?! I'm so disappointed.
Kronk: Papi… I have a confession. I'm not who you think I am. I, uh… I'm just a humble fry cook. And head delivery boy. That's not all. Chicha's not my wife. None of these folks are my wives. And these aren't my kids. Not even the ones who really are kids. Yeah, and that big house up on the hill, that's not mine either. And Pachita… [Pacha takes off his women's hat disguise] not even a woman. I lied to you, Papi. I just wanted you to be proud of me. I just wanted to get… [holds up a thumbs up] one of these. But all I ever got from you was… [Papi gives him a scowled look on his face] Yeah, that. I'm a failure. The truth is…I've got nothing.
Chaca: [walks up to him] But Kronk, you've got us.
Kronk: And I wouldn't trade you guys for anything.
Papi: Well, that would explain why you don't have anything.
Rudy: For your information, Kronk used to have a big house.
Ipi: On a hill.
Topo: But he gave it away to us old folks.
Chaca: And he had a girlfriend too. They baked us raisin bread.
Waitress: He gave up all those things to protect his friends.
Kronk: You were actually listening to my stories?
Waitress: I was weeping on the inside.
Kronk: Wait a second. I really wouldn't trade you guys for anything. Not even for a thumbs up. You see, Papi, you may look at my life and think I've got nothing, but the truth is… I've got everything.
Papi: Not yet, you don't. [gives his son a thumbs up and smiles] I'm proud of you, son.

Taglines

You've got to be true to your groove.

Walt Disney Pictures presents Kronk's New Groove

The groove is on the move.

See also

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